Last Sunday, I was talking to Cody right after church. We were standing around with some of our friends when he said, "I learned something today." He said it in that tone of voice that says, "This is serious."
Maybe I was afraid of how serious it was going to be because I tried to make light of it. He would not allow it at all. As I kept interrupting him in a vain attempt to keep things light, he said firmly, "Let me finish." So, I did.
He said, "I've been preparing to leave for Iraq and I am not afraid. Nope, I am not afraid or reluctant to fight and die for my country and the cause of freedom." He had my complete attention. He continued, "But, I am apparently unwilling to give anything near that kind of sacrifice for my God and my faith."
Wow, this kind of transparency right after church caught me completely by surprise. Maybe I should expect it from friends, and maybe I should be willing to be transparent, but the truth of the matter is that neither is true. I was humbled, and I knew I needed to focus on these words that were an expression of his trust. I listened as carefully as I could to honor this act.
When Cody finished, I realized that he was under conviction about this difference between his bravery in defending his country and his complacency in defending his faith. Conviction like this is kind of messy, so it is no surprise that some of it got on me. I told Cody that the only difference between us was that I wasn't brave enough to defend my country, but I was at least as complacent as he was. I soon discovered that he was not nearly as complacent as he thought that he was.
After finally getting to share his lesson uninterrupted, I asked Cody, "So now what?" He began telling me about how in Iraq he had to be willing to quickly pull the trigger in some difficult situations. These were terrible situations. Situations that change people whether they want to be changed or not, and these were the kinds of situations that no training or preparation could completely prepare a person to meet. He knew that this was a crossroads in his life, and he was concerned about what kind of person he would be on the other side of the intersection.
I asked Cody again, "So, now what?"
He said, "Trent when I pull that trigger I know that people will die and they will go to hell. I know it, but I am going to protect my men, regardless. A bigger problem for me is that there are men, my men, all around me who, when they get hit, will go to hell too."
One more time I asked, "So, now what are you going to do about the thing you learned today?"
He said, "Do you have any idea how many parties they, my men, have invited me too? They found out that I am a 24 year old virgin and they don't think that any man should go to Iraq as a virgin."
I asked him, "Do they know why you are a virgin?"
He said, "Yes, and it has made them more determined. Some of them are doing everything they can to get me drunk and then get me laid. And you know what? I am seriously thinking about it.
"In fact, the other night I was going with them. I knew that I was going, but my brother called me at the last minute and began asking me questions until he figured out what my plans were. He told me that I had an emergency family meeting at his house, and I had to be there. I told him about my plans, and he just said again, 'get over here or I will come over there and get you.'
"You see, if I don't get some guys to help me, I'm going to fall. One guy, though, came up to me and said, 'Hey, you are one of the few really righteous people I know.' I told him that's great and all but I am really tempted. He said, 'That's what makes me think you're righteous."
Cody and I continued talking for a while, but I don't remember the rest. None of it was nearly as important as this part. I thought about it for a while and realized that he may be going to Iraq to fight, but he is already in a fire fight of faith right here and it sure doesn't seem complacent to me.
Maybe I was afraid of how serious it was going to be because I tried to make light of it. He would not allow it at all. As I kept interrupting him in a vain attempt to keep things light, he said firmly, "Let me finish." So, I did.
He said, "I've been preparing to leave for Iraq and I am not afraid. Nope, I am not afraid or reluctant to fight and die for my country and the cause of freedom." He had my complete attention. He continued, "But, I am apparently unwilling to give anything near that kind of sacrifice for my God and my faith."
Wow, this kind of transparency right after church caught me completely by surprise. Maybe I should expect it from friends, and maybe I should be willing to be transparent, but the truth of the matter is that neither is true. I was humbled, and I knew I needed to focus on these words that were an expression of his trust. I listened as carefully as I could to honor this act.
When Cody finished, I realized that he was under conviction about this difference between his bravery in defending his country and his complacency in defending his faith. Conviction like this is kind of messy, so it is no surprise that some of it got on me. I told Cody that the only difference between us was that I wasn't brave enough to defend my country, but I was at least as complacent as he was. I soon discovered that he was not nearly as complacent as he thought that he was.
After finally getting to share his lesson uninterrupted, I asked Cody, "So now what?" He began telling me about how in Iraq he had to be willing to quickly pull the trigger in some difficult situations. These were terrible situations. Situations that change people whether they want to be changed or not, and these were the kinds of situations that no training or preparation could completely prepare a person to meet. He knew that this was a crossroads in his life, and he was concerned about what kind of person he would be on the other side of the intersection.
I asked Cody again, "So, now what?"
He said, "Trent when I pull that trigger I know that people will die and they will go to hell. I know it, but I am going to protect my men, regardless. A bigger problem for me is that there are men, my men, all around me who, when they get hit, will go to hell too."
One more time I asked, "So, now what are you going to do about the thing you learned today?"
He said, "Do you have any idea how many parties they, my men, have invited me too? They found out that I am a 24 year old virgin and they don't think that any man should go to Iraq as a virgin."
I asked him, "Do they know why you are a virgin?"
He said, "Yes, and it has made them more determined. Some of them are doing everything they can to get me drunk and then get me laid. And you know what? I am seriously thinking about it.
"In fact, the other night I was going with them. I knew that I was going, but my brother called me at the last minute and began asking me questions until he figured out what my plans were. He told me that I had an emergency family meeting at his house, and I had to be there. I told him about my plans, and he just said again, 'get over here or I will come over there and get you.'
"You see, if I don't get some guys to help me, I'm going to fall. One guy, though, came up to me and said, 'Hey, you are one of the few really righteous people I know.' I told him that's great and all but I am really tempted. He said, 'That's what makes me think you're righteous."
Cody and I continued talking for a while, but I don't remember the rest. None of it was nearly as important as this part. I thought about it for a while and realized that he may be going to Iraq to fight, but he is already in a fire fight of faith right here and it sure doesn't seem complacent to me.
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